Anyone Else Happily Married

Discussion in 'General Industry Related Topics' started by Rokin, Apr 7, 2006.

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  1. sallysts

    sallysts

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    185
    happy

    I would go one step further and say that getting an occasional strange keeps us happily married. If not for a little variety once in a while, you might be very un-happy and divorce becasue you want something more. I am happily married for 15 years, and only go for massage with happy endings. It is just enough to give me a little something different and send me home happy!
  2. Monk

    Monk

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    3,381
    No, I was just being flip. (Hey, at least I'm honest)
    Last edited: Apr 19, 2006
  3. Rokin

    Rokin

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    2,846
    Hytek
    I believe that you and your wife are truly enlightened people and quite happy.
    Keep writing and put it into a book/movie and make millions.
  4. Slinky Bender

    Slinky Bender The All Powerful Moderator

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    19,817

    ooops
  5. Gavvy Cravath

    Gavvy Cravath Moderator Emeritus

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    12,971
    Hey, where's bunyon's post in this thread?
  6. curious

    curious

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    1,872
    I didn't see where Monk mentioned other women here.
  7. Slinky Bender

    Slinky Bender The All Powerful Moderator

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    19,817
    I think he meant from other women (I could be wrong).

    PS Great fucking post/story.

    PPS It would be really wonderful (if not too painful for either of you) to see her posting here as well. This is an interesting ewnough subject that if you wanted to tell "your stories" over time you could have your own section.
  8. Hytek

    Hytek

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    14
    misterr-
    She is Caucasian. When we met long ago, she worked at one of the wonderful American-owned massage parlors in Ct. In the past few years, they've all been shut down by the Feds and local LE and replaced by Asians and Russians.

    Monk-
    She won't let me pay for the sex any more except if we go to a motel to play ho and John games. Afterwards, she'll use the cash to buy me something special.
  9. Monk

    Monk

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    3,381
    Hytek - Do you still pay her for sex?

    Out Of Control - Since you no longer see your ATF, I think you should tell us who she is. (Think of this way, you'll be doing her a favor, more than replacing the business she lost since you stopped booking her.)
  10. Amber Jewel

    Amber Jewel

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    67
    whoops

    posted in wrong thread
    Last edited: Apr 15, 2006
  11. misterrr

    misterrr

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    57
    Hytek

    Very interesting story. I am curious as to her ethnicity? Caucasian, Asian, Russian, Latino, etc.
  12. Hytek

    Hytek

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    14
    I married my ATF

    I have a happy marriage and I see providers. In fact, one of those providers is my wife. I've been happily married to A for 12 years and known her since 1990. It's been an amazing adventure.

    We met when A was working in a massage parlor in Connecticut and I was a customer. We enjoyed each other in every way, spent a lot of our time together there talking, and became friends. After several months, we began meeting on the outside. She was the most fascinating woman I had ever met, well-educated with wide-ranging interests and we had a lot in common. I always paid for the sex and never suggested that I should stop paying or that she should stop seeing other clients. I also hired her to work in my business because she was an artist and I had need of her skills.

    When we met, both of our marriages were beginning to come apart, and after a year or so, A left her husband. She didn't have kids. I couldn't bear to leave my children (a pre-teen and a 5 year old) , so I remained in a troubled marriage. I helped A to leave the massage parlor and become an independent provider. (pre-internet) I also helped her develop a business as a photographer. We were best friends, lovers, and business associates.

    In 1993, my wife died in an automobile accident. I was now a single parent with two traumatized children. A was incredibly supportive to me and my kids in dealing with the loss. After about 6 months, she moved in with us, and gradually began to fill the role of mother to the children. She was a wonderful step-mom. The kids fell in love with her and she with them. A told me that she wanted to "retire" temporarily as a provider so that she could put her energies into being a mom and building her other businesses.

    Eight years passed. We were a more or less normal suburban family. Then, three years ago, A informed me that she wanted to come out of retirement as an escort. She missed the excitement of being a provider and the social contact. She would seek to develop a small group of clients who were capable of paying high fees and who also wanted the personal connection of being friends, not just customers. She wanted to help put money aside for our kids' college and graduate school educations, and she wanted to invest in her career as an artist. (Fortunately, I do well as an advertising consultant, so A is able to spend and invest the money she earns on whatever she wants.)

    I thought about her decision and decided to support it, although I wrestled with issues of trust and jealousy that I thought had been resolved years before. I have profound respect for the profession of escort. What could be more wonderful and nourishing than a job where you help others to feel good about themselves and the world around them... where you help others experience pleasure and get to experience it yourself... where you are a friend and a confidante. A enriches my life beyond anything I could have imagined. I have no problem with her sharing herself with others. A is also totally open with her family and close friends about her work as a provider, although she keeps it secret from ordinary acquaintances.

    For us, trust has been built from striving to be honest and open with each other. I have the freedom to play around with other women if I choose as long as I don't keep it a secret. I only occasionally exercise this freedom, especially since A began bringing girlfriends home to mess around with both of us) And A is totally open with me about her work.

    At first, jealousy was a problem. I didn't mind that A was with other guys, after all, that was her job and it was how we met. I was anxious because I feared she would enjoy someone else more than she enjoyed me and might leave me for someone wealthier, better looking, or sexier.

    I overcame the jealousy by coming to understand that helping A to have a happy and fulfilling life is one of the greatest sources of joy in my own life. So, if she finds life more fulfilling with someone else, I want her to do what is best for her. But, through her actions and her words, I know that I and my children are at the center of her life, and that we are loved. A has taught me that we all have an infinite capacity for love, and that it is natural for us to love, make love with and be friends with more than one person.

    No marriage is perfect. We do have conflicts. Most of our fights stem from our different styles of parenting. She feels I am too indulgent and permissive as a father, and she is probably right. We never have conflicts about sex and we never have conflicts about money. After 16 years together, sex remains phenominal. Our love for each other continues to grow. We think of ourselves as a team, and we continue to learn from each other.

    I am not suggesting that the only way to both have a happy marriage and indulge in the "hobby" is to marry your ATF, but, for us, that's the way it worked out.
  13. Mr. Wet Wooly

    Mr. Wet Wooly

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    1,984
    How on earth can you ask that question on this board?
  14. treborny

    treborny

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    837
    An affair can get emotional, plus she would expect you to talk to her before, during and after. This is simple, it's just business. The only bad part is buyer's remorse after a bad session.
  15. vorhaut

    vorhaut

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    551
    Happily Married?

    She's Happy... I'm Married.
  16. nyclap

    nyclap

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    74
    Agree with Frank. I'm married happily for 15 years, mongering for last 3. I tell myself I would never, ever have an affair, because emotionally I've got everything I need at home. But I do like having sex with pretty young women, so I monger. Seems like less of a betrayal than an extended affair.
  17. studman

    studman

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    330
    You Hope!

    UNFORTUNATELY, MANY MONGERS UNINTENTIONALLY HAVE BEEN LED DOWN THAT BEATEN PATH AND BECAME EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED TO A PROVIDER! MAKE SURE IT DOESN'T HAPPEN!!
  18. FrankM61962

    FrankM61962

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    174
    I'm happily married also...I just recently got remarried last year, in my first marriage I had several affairs, most of which led to emotional attachments...I just think that now that I monger instead of having personal relationships I don't have to worry about these emotional attachments which could really cause alot of trouble in my new marriage...as in the case of several others who have posted here my wife does not deny me of anything sexually, but for some reason I am drawn to the variety and perhaps (excitement?) of younger women.
  19. meth

    meth

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    343
    Married 10 years, must say happily.......however didn't start mongering until about the 7 year itch. I continue to do it, even though afterwards I always have tremendous guilt and then sometimes paranoia of std's. I guess it comes with the risk of mongering, however I am always fearful on how the hell I would explain it. Bottom line though, when I feel guilty I am a better husband.....kind of a sick way of justifying
  20. DarkStar62

    DarkStar62

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    87
    Married 15 years (holy shit, that sounds a lot longer than it's felt). Three kids. Marriage runs hot and cold. If it weren't for the kids, we'd probably have at least seperated by now.

    Mongering runs hot and cold also, although not in neccessarily the same cycle.

    Haven't really found a reason for my mongering. I have lots of rationales, but haven't found THE reason(s).