Customers can hustle dancers too

Discussion in 'Stripclubs, Strippers and Porn Stars' started by Wwanderer, Feb 18, 2003.

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  1. Danielle

    Danielle

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    I can definetely respect that approach, Thorn. Sparkiling wit and charming personality go a long way with me. I'll often spend large amounts of uncompensated time talking with someone I really like when the club's not busy.
  2. Thorn

    Thorn

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    Certainly there is. I believe it one has one hard, fast rule. Something to do with theirs one born every minute, or words to that effect.

    Now that is the smartest thing I have heard said on the topic to date.

    You and I, Danielle, meeting in a strip-club would either have the shortest conversation on record, or really hit it off. No middle ground. :)

    Would you respect that my general M.O. in strip-clubs is to be polite, but very direct about what I want, and expect, before I part with any kind of real capital? I do take, "No", for an answer and that doesn't mean I won't pass the time of day with you, purchase a drink, or even tip for time spent or tame lap dances. I just won't part with any long green for those things. I'd tip the appropriate amount and any additional compensation would simply have to be my charming wit and sparkling personality. :D <- dumb grin
    Last edited: Feb 28, 2003
  3. Slinky Bender

    Slinky Bender The All Powerful Moderator

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    We've made our way back to Tootsie again.......
  4. Danielle

    Danielle

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    455
    I don't care what anyone says. I will forever maintain that not getting anything extra for your money should be the understood default belief when it comes to strip club dynamics. I'm not disputing that extras are often bought and sold both inside and outside of clubs, but customers do not have the right to expect these extras. No matter how much they spend. Unless of course the dancer tells him he should expect them. And then if she does not deliver, she is an asshole and a liar. But I don't believe that a dancer deserves to be shamed for making money off of someone's undiscussed assumptions.

    I don't know if there exists any real set of working "rules" for behavior within a strip club. The only thing I have to say is don't expect anything. Always ask questions, and make sure you know what you're paying for (or working for), if you have any concern at all for the outcome of the transaction.
  5. Slinky Bender

    Slinky Bender The All Powerful Moderator

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    jl,

    I think what you are leaving out is that "the big lie", and "the rules" aren't what they are purported to be. What actually happens in the business is this:

    Good looking girl comes into stripclub after reading "make big money" ad, but has never stripped before. Club Owner and "seasoned strippers" lie to them about what the rules are, knowing full well that the majority of girls are in some way, shape or form "bad girls". but they know that if they said this to the newbie, they'd have to hold down every piece of paper in the club so that they didn't get sucked out the door by the vacuum created by the rapid departure of the Newbie. But inside, they know that either the newbie will learn how to hustle, become a bad girl, or leave the buiness shortly. And they don't care which one of those three happens.

    Unfortunatley, a certain amount of newbies don't pick up on this too quickly, and get angry that the customers don't seem to know "the rules"*. But when you look at it, it's more the seasoned customers who don't seem to know the rules than the newbie customers - what does that indicate to you? When the seasoned guys know something that the newbies don't in any business, it's an indeaction to me that the "real rules" are probably what is indicated by the seasoned guys performance, not what they are purported to be, or what the newbie is led to believe. And in my experience, it's not the nebie guys who are overly prone to be giving girls these payments. Most newbie guys believe Chris Rock. i think that more often, it's the guys who know what "really goes on", and know that the majority of girls actually do "give something" in return for these payments, that "teaches them" what their behaviour should be.

    *of course it doesn't help that the majority of strippers, since they don't want to be seen as "prostitutes", lie to everyone, including their co-workers, about what they do, and with whom.
  6. justlooking

    justlooking

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    The problem that a lot of the guys here have is with what seems to us like strippers' wanting to both have their cake and eat it (as danger-us put it).

    I'm not singling you out. This is a common disagreement I have with strippers I know. And it's much worse on Stripper Web.

    What we hear is a lot of strippers describing their job as something we have a hard time believing exists, because it doesn't make any sense to us. Then, the strippers complain when customers don't act in accordance with their purported belief as to what their job is. But what really gets us is, nine times out of ten, the strippers don't complain that their job is different from what they had thought. They complain that the customers "don't know the rules".
    Last edited: Feb 26, 2003
  7. justlooking

    justlooking

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    What I was trying to say is, you probably "heard" before you started that you could make a lot of money stripping and it would be "safe". And you seem to think that the fact your club accepts a lot of money from you for the house fee (which you view as paying them to protect you) supports your continuing to believe that.

    But the big spenders have "heard" (or more likely experienced) that a lot of strippers at clubs like yours will entertain offers for outside activities if they drop a lot of money on the strippers (and maybe on the club as well). And the big spenders might perceive the fact that you accept a lot of money from them over repeat visits for essentially nothing (which they view as paying you to consider seeing them outside) as supporting their continuing to believe that.

    To repeat, I am NOT saying that accepting that money obligates you to do anything. I am only asking you to accept that the guys who give it to you give it to you for a reason, and that by taking it you're exploiting the fact that they're thinking something different from what you apparently are.
    Last edited: Feb 26, 2003
  8. justme

    justme <i>pop and click tainted</i> Vinyl ( is dead )

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    I can't think of many safer jobs than stripping.

    I mean, you may be manhandled a bit, but you've always got the security of the various really huge dudes walking around.

    (Or maybe the really huge dude phenomenon is only a Houston thing?)


    -------

    Maybe I'm just being sensitive because I had to run for my life (in dress shoes!) the other day when the idiot business owner that I was meeting with (to suck up to and try to get his business) forgot to tie up the big ass dog guarding his shop.

    Who says finance is boring?
  9. Danielle

    Danielle

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    I'm not sure that I understand exactly what you're saying JL, but I think that the fact that I pay the club a house fee every night entitles me to a safe working environment. And I don't feel entitled to making great money. I am thankful that I have the opportunity to do so at such an early point in my life.
  10. justme

    justme <i>pop and click tainted</i> Vinyl ( is dead )

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    I dunno if I'd claim it was self-centered, but it might be a little disjoint from reality.
  11. Slinky Bender

    Slinky Bender The All Powerful Moderator

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    Are you saying her attitude is self centered? (gee, I think I heard that somewhere before..... :p).
  12. Thorn

    Thorn

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    Ohhwwwww!

    I just get all goose pimpled when you get all logical and shit. :)
    Last edited: Feb 26, 2003
  13. justlooking

    justlooking

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    I don't want to inflict my own dislike of my work on everybody else, but ask yourself why your perceived entitlement to "great money" for work that is "safe" and "exciting" is any more justifiable than the "big spenders'" perceived entitlement to access to the inside of your pants after they've spent lots and lots of money on you.
    Last edited: Feb 26, 2003
  14. justlooking

    justlooking

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  15. justme

    justme <i>pop and click tainted</i> Vinyl ( is dead )

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    Daniella - Oh, I definitely agree with you.

    It's basically just that the market dissappeared for this particular service (although I'm sure it'll return when vice begins to control what has become an extremely booming commercial sex scene here).

    But markets dry up all the time.

    Just ask an energy trader.
  16. Thorn

    Thorn

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    Now here I am in total agreement with you.

    Dancers should know themselves well, have set limits for themselves before they get too deeply involved in the business, and then stick to them.

    Everyone is different and there will be dancers for every taste. But to do things that make you incredibly uncomfortable means great mental anquish for you, and a really lousy experience for the client. A no win scenario all around.
  17. Thorn

    Thorn

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    "Frontage" seemed to go the way of all things as well.
  18. Danielle

    Danielle

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    That's terrible. If it ever got so bad for me that I was forced to offer extras I would start bartending again. I mean, what's the point of continuing to dance if the money's no good and you have to do things you may be uncomfortable with? Once all of the reasons a girl might have started dancing fall apart, then why continue? I'm curious. I started dancing because it seemed like a relatively safe and exciting way to make great money. If the money started to really suck, I had to disrespect myself and hated every minute of it I would stop immediately. No question.
  19. justme

    justme <i>pop and click tainted</i> Vinyl ( is dead )

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    Actually, I've heard from dancers here in Houston that things have progressed to the point that you pretty much have to offer extras if you want to make a living.
  20. Danielle

    Danielle

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    For once I must agree with Slinky. There have been periods of time when even for me I am satisfied with 240, and I work at one of the better clubs in Manhattan. I certainly do not consider that a good night by any means, but on a Monday in the middle of July or January I probably wouldn't go home complaining bitterly. I can see how some of the girls who work outside Manhattan might be perfectly happy making around 250 a night right now. Hey, the industry sucks right now for the supply side.