GFE, mistress or wife? What's best?

Discussion in 'General Industry Related Topics' started by hot4chicks, Jun 17, 2001.

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  1. sigma089

    sigma089

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    61
    wifey joke

    With all the "wifey" comparisons, I just can't resist. A guy with a beautiful fiancee gets a fabulous job that pays him an astronomical salary. He and his lady tie the knot, but as soon as he gets close in bed, she demands $$$$$. He figures "what the hell" and plays along -- sometimes the fantasy even helps. Years go by like this, and meanwhile this guy has taken over the company and owns it 100%.

    Unfortunately, recession hits, and his firm is going under. When he finally works up the courage to explain the new financial situation to his wife, she says "Don't worry about a thing, dear. Remember all the $$$$$ you've been giving me every time we have sex? Well I've been investing all the money in high-yield securities, and there's nearly enough there to take care of both of us for the rest of our lives."

    "Oh, sh*t!" he responds.

    "What's the problem?" she asks.

    "If I had known what you'd been doing with the money, I'd have given you ALL my business."
  2. Slinky Bender

    Slinky Bender The All Powerful Moderator

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    19,480
    At least that explains the recent flooding......
  3. Geezy Muldoon

    Geezy Muldoon Gold

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    2,351
    Or offer your unconsummated (in any form) lust up to G-d. Virgin Mary sheds a single tear each time a boy plays with himself, or so I was told as a child.
  4. nycstripclubs

    nycstripclubs

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    1,065
    The most cost efficient method is to use your left hand.
  5. thelastone

    thelastone

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    132
    wives...

    justme has got a very good point.

    Why not just get a wife that supports you? or at the very least can support herself?
    If she doesn't want children, and is willing to go on the pill, then this kind of negates your generalization.

    basically, making that kind of generalization about wives, gfs, or providers doesn't really amount to much because there are so many differences among each group that nailing it down to something more defined, doesn't really help.

    last
  6. hot4chicks

    hot4chicks

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    1,118
    Wives are least cost-effective for providing good sex. You gotta feed, clothe and support them. At least with chicks, the cost is fixed and finite. OTOH, wives tend to have unprotected sex, which is good - but can also become very expensive if you have a child.

    h4c, cost conscious
  7. justme

    justme <i>pop and click tainted</i> Vinyl ( is dead )

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    The question is a bit like asking: which is better, dinner in a restaurant or a home cooked meal? Which restaurant, which home, and at what time? I don't think that there's any generaliztion which is at all usefull.
  8. markymark

    markymark

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    well put Judge, which proves my greater point:that sex with a wife (for good or bad) does not belong in this thread, its inherently different. Now sex with a girlfriend, esp a casual "dating" girlfriend is worthy of comparing on a "cost effective" basis, which was this thread's focus.
  9. sneaker

    sneaker

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    201
    Father's Day gift

    Wifey gave me one helluva BBBJTC. I get stiff just thinking about it.
  10. Geezy Muldoon

    Geezy Muldoon Gold

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    Think

    [Edited by Judge Crater on 07-25-2001 at 05:25 PM]
  11. markymark

    markymark

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    true, but remember: you are paying for a quality experience. If sex with the wife is crappy (or non-existent), your financial situation with her does not change. Even good sex with wifey doesn't necessarily change your financial relationship. <insert joke here>
    So I think that wives belong in a different category than girlfriends/providers, as they are on the quanity end of the graph. Unless of course, we are discussing trophy wives, which is another matter entirely.
  12. Geezy Muldoon

    Geezy Muldoon Gold

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    cost.

    [Edited by Judge Crater on 07-25-2001 at 05:24 PM]
  13. Eye Won

    Eye Won

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    218
    It's a skill

    It's a skill that must be mastered......
    Imperialone....OUT!!!!!
  14. thelastone

    thelastone

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    That is some setup...

    With the GF and wife, you had extra cash to see a provider once and awhile???

    Now thats amazing...

    last
  15. Bill Furniture

    Bill Furniture Flounder

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    I feel your pain brotha!
  16. Eye Won

    Eye Won

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    Great Post....

    Well....
    For me it's a little different... My wife never demanded too much as far as material things. Doesn't like jewelry, I even had to find a silver engagement and wedding ring... As far as cars and houses, she had a decent car and a big house but nothing that couldn't be handled.
    As far as country clubs go..... Those of you that have met me know that no country club on this planet is gonna let me be a member. So that's another savings.

    As far as providers go, I only do that when I have the extra cash. So that really never put me in a hole. Like you said the cost is fixed, and if you don't have the cash, then you don't do it..

    For me, it's the girlfriend. Why, because you wind up spending tons of money on hotel rooms (especially when you are still with your wife), then let's say she lives far away, then you start traveling to see her and that starts to get costly. Then you wind up realizing that you can't keep skimming of your check without your wife realizing, so you get a charge card for yourself and start racking up bills, and then when holidays come up, you have to but 2 sets of gifts, 2 birthdays to deal with, it goes on and on......

    And yes, this is my life, I hope you can all feel me pain...

    Imperialone....OUT!!!!!
  17. hot4chicks

    hot4chicks

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    1,118
    OK, with all due respect to everyone here, here goes-

    Which is better and more cost-effective - a 'provider', a mistress, a GF or a wife?

    Assuming a guy is married, being caught with GF, mistress or provider all get a similar reaction and cost from wifey. But LE doesn't look twice at GFs or mistresses - so the risk of getting laid decreases significantly. Going to dinner with a mistress or GF is explainable, because she probably hasnt boinked 500 other guys in the past year, so she has some anonymity.

    Cost-wise, a wife is most expenisve. After amortizing costs such as houses, cars, country club memberships, jewelery and clothes, I'd guess getting laid by my ex, ran about $14,000/orgasm.

    Costs are fixed with a provider, so thats reasonable. A GF prides herself on putting out for free, thats good. A mistress may demand certain expenses be paid or trips provided, so its a bit unknown, but still cheaper than a wife.

    What do you guys and chicks think?

    h4c, risk adverse, but cost conscious