Discussion in 'Newbie Forum' started by superwoman01, Mar 8, 2006.
How long, in your opinion, have men been been going to see gynecologist's?
Some one was granted a US patent for a powder drink mix that satisfies 98.6% of semen tasters. It's made of freeze dried pineapple, broccoli and other junk. You can look it up at uspto*****.
Good advice, as long as they don't try to take PAP smears from my dick!
Nobody actually eats parsley.
What's the difference between parsley and pussy?
Here's my sperm joke:
An 85 year old man visits his doctor to get a sperm count. The geezer's given a jar and told to bring back a sample. The next day he returns to the doctor with an empty jar.
"What happened?" says the doctor.
"Well," the old man starts, "I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her left -- nothing. Then she tried with her mouth, first with her teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing. We even called Evelyn, the lady next door, but still nothing."
The doctor bursts out, "You asked your neighbor?"
"Yep, No matter what we tried we couldn't get that damn jar open."
Yo momma got fired for drinking on the job down at the sperm bank.
Troutman you make me laugh. Here is one back at you
SPERM BANK ROBBERY
A man wearing a balaclava bursts into a sperm bank with a shot gun. "Open the f*****g safe!" he yells at the girl behind the counter. "But we're not a real bank" replies the girl. "This is a sperm bank, we don't hold money". "Don't argue just open the safe or I'll blow your f*****g head off!" She obliges and opens the safe door.
"Take one of the bottles and drink it!"
"But it's full of sperm" the girl replies nervously.
"Don't argue, just drink it" he says. She prises off the cap and gulps it down.
"Take out another one and drink it too!" he demands. The girl drinks another one. Suddenly the guy pulls off the balaclava and to the girl's amazement it's her husband.......
"Not that f*****g difficult is it?" he says
Mark Spitz and Louganis swallows.
Which reminds me. What's the difference between Olympic swimming and Olympic diving?
I have found that a small can of pineapple juice in the morning can make the difference between spit and swallow.
The scent of a crisp $100 bill does wonders to make your jizzim taste like champagne.
I've eaten tons of carbs and washed it down with gallons of alcohol. Unfortunately I'm also now 100lbs overweight and diabetic.
I'd like to suggest the taste of semen is totally irrelavant.
I for one, can help with the in and out process.
What's your location baby?
I thought this was a interesting article. I placed it here to
avoid the flamesKennedy
Consuming pineapple and/or parsley helps sweeten the taste of the male ejaculate. Can there be any truth to this and what other foods affect the taste, for better or for worse?"
Yes, what you eat can influence the taste and smell of your ejaculate. This is something like the smell of your sweat on the next day of a heavily spicy and garlic full dinner.
Because the average ejaculate consists mostly of protein, citric acid, fructose, sodium, chloride and smaller amounts of ammonia, ascorbic acid, acid phosphates, calcium, carbon dioxide, cholesterol, prostaglandins, creatine, and other minerals and chemicals which are produced by the prostate gland, cowpers gland, testicles and many other parts of your body, but shortly by "your body", and your body can only use its stocks and what you eat as its raw material.
Of course, every body has its own formula to create the semen, but eating less meat (and proteins) and more carbo hydrates, vegetables and fresh fruits may improve the taste and smell. For example parsley is a healthy plant and may also help to make your body juices more sweeter.
In general, dairy products create the foulest tasting fluids, alkaline based foods as meat and fish produce a butter, fish taste. Fruits and quality alcohol are good for a pleasant, sugary flavor. Chemically processed liquors may cause an acidic taste.
As said previously, ejaculate containing sperm has a unique individual taste for each male. Some males have bitter tasting ejaculate, tastes burnt, sour and strong. Other males, primarily vegetarians have ejaculate that generally tastes sweet, nut like. But to produce healthy semen your body will need some protein rich in zinc anyways.
A strong smell may also indicate an infection in genitals and you should urgently visit a gynecologist without losing time in the search of the magic formula!
Of course your body's duty is not to produce tasty semen, but healthy and productive sperms. Everything healthy and good for your body is healthy and good for your semen. Drink mild water on the morning and keep drinking more water than usual in the day, this will also help your bowels and your body to detoxinate. Eat less meat, more vegetables, drink less alcohol and stop smoking.
Finally, if your partner really loves you she/he must love everything about you. Don't spend your time to change small details, instead, learn how to be a great lover that nobody is interested with your semen taste/smell.
The same is valid for vaginal secretions, and women have to be careful to improve the taste which is salty and acidic. But women's problem, mostly, is related to cleanliness, usually they don't know how to, truly, in and out cleaning process.
Separate names with a comma.