Review writing school

Discussion in 'Cloud Nine's Review School' started by Cloud Nine, Apr 6, 2006.

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  1. Hombre's Ghost

    Hombre's Ghost

    I seem to recall some of the more prolific and infamous members would ignore rules like this completely, freestyling and experimenting with the form. But that was way, way back in the days of steam-powered review boards.
  2. Stashu


    My two cents:

    The Review function is the #1 reason I joined. It's like Yelp. I want to know where to find exactly what I want. AMP for example, I've been turned away by some. Waste of time. I want to know if it's safe (the reason I always include that in my reviews). Some of us are conspicuous in some neighborhoods. And wtf, it's criminal activity which means you're interacting with criminals in a business where disputes cannot be mediated by the law. I also want to know what can be had and what people pay. Market transparency always benefits the consumer. It also has a salutary effect for providers; a good reputation is profitable for them and makes things safer for them. They too are engaging in an activity where disputes cannot be mediated by the law, and that leaves them in a very vulnerable position. (I've been waiting for a year to use the word "salutary" in a sentence.)

    I like reviews that provide objective details. I like my girls thick, you like them thin. Just saying that her body is an 8, without something more descriptive (e.g. she is 5' and around 120 pounds, or she's around 5'6" and really thick with a big ass and 44 dd tits) doesn't help guys find whatever it is they're looking for.

    On the details of the action: for me, it's enough to know that she gave a great bbbj, or that she's a lackluster fuck, or that she didn't give up her ass until you had seen her 3 times. The Penthouse Forum style of writing does include those sorts of details, but I don't really need stuff like "she moaned softly as I entered her wet sex..." etc.

    On the other hand: where else can we tell the stories? It's not like you can go home or back to work and tell your friends "I paid 100 bucks for a blowjob last night, when she was done I had to pull the sheets out of my asshole." If I met a girl at a bar and got a bj in my car (and wasn't married) I'd hell yeah tell my buddies and high-five. So telling stories here is part of the fun.

    So to summarize: I value factual, detailed reviews because they help me make the best choices and avoid trouble. And I try to write in a way that helps fellow hobbyists find what they want the same way.
    vad1, SirKniight and MayorSimpleton like this.
  3. Mr. Wiggley

    Mr. Wiggley

    One of the big reasons I don't like to visit a private house. Too easy to be tracked. Even had a provider once tell me "nothing would happen I already have your plate number". Of course she also had a machete under the bed.
    Woodguy and Banacek like this.
  4. Banacek

    Banacek SAM I am

    Good point. That's certainly a consideration. Although a provider would have to go to some lengths to track you down through a license plate. Still, it's another good reason for parking in an adjoining lot, as some members have suggested in the past.
    SirKniight likes this.
  5. Li631


    If I recall did it not come up where a provider admitted to writing down license plates in the parking lot of her visitors. Even with a burner phone a license plate check might reveal a true identity of the monger and that whole payback is a bitch thing.
    Mr. Wiggley likes this.
  6. Banacek

    Banacek SAM I am

    I think that tactic was more for someone who intended to see the provider again. Although I have no definitve way to know what the author had in his head, I focused on the phrase "some negative comments" for that interpretation. But if I had no intention in seeing her again, as with your example, then I agree that a timely review will limit damages for others.
  7. lightweight

    lightweight Moderator

    i wanted to comment on this post. I am trying to read a lot of old posts to see what has been going on here. My 2 cents. If I had a bad experience, I would want her to know it was me writing that she sucked. I would never wait a week to 10 days. Fuck that. I want her to know it was me that is saying she sucked, or wasn't good or was not what I expected it to be or thought I was paying for. I say post it right away . Why give guys another 10 days to see her and be disappointed . You are helping the board more by writing the bad review ASAP. Plus I would never be seeing her again anyway, why not help everyone here so they know what they may be in for, or give them a chance to by pass them.
  8. powerbead


    very helpful. thank you!
  9. JJJJ



    Moderator politely asked that I read "writing a review section" after a second of "WTF?" , I did..... I write here for a few reasons. One of these reasons is to give info to fellow Mongers in hopes of gaining info. Below, is one of the posts which gives a clear outline of what is expected in a review, I think this is very helpful!
    1) Contact info (post whatever is advertised, I do understand that you may have an escort that gives you a private phone number, I'm not asking you to post that)
    2) How you found out about her services.
    3) Description of escort (also, does she match her pictures?)
    4) Description of location (again, if it is a private locale, then just give basics and not details)
    5) Description of your expectations
    6) Description of services provided
    7) Fees and tips given
    8) Whether this was your first experience with this agency/escort and if you plan on seeing again
    9) Whether your expectations were met
    Added by Moderator:
    The title of the thread MUST contain the phone number in the format XXX-XXX-XXXX
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 12, 2015
  10. indrid_cold


    This was very helpful thx
  11. Jujucares


    lots of great info. Thanks
  12. Slinky Bender

    Slinky Bender The All Powerful Moderator

    One pet peeve of mine:

    ATF means All Time Favorite. You can't write every review, or even a bunch of your "ATF" (unless it's reviewing the same person), or have every one you see give the BEST BBBJ or whatever. SOMEONE better be average!
    Haileeonthebeach likes this.
  13. manitoba


    One way to avoid getting you identified as the reviewer in case you are making some negative comments about the lady is to wait a week or 10 days before posting the review.

    That way unless the lady knows your handle or you refer to something specific that happened during the session that sticks out in her mind she cannot associate the review with any individual client.
  14. fumpton


    not exactly. You can post in existing threads once you register a screen name. However, you can only start new threads when you have a certain number of posts.
  15. jahpickny



    i'm not sure when i can write a review. i'm new to this site but i've visited several AMP & Rmp in Brooklyn and Manhattan could you let me know when i'm alowed to post a review?
    i noticed that on other threads the comment that i must have some time as a member to post
  16. funstr


    great stuff...thank you all
  17. JerichoAddict


    This was useful
  18. Priceless


    ug rocks!!
  19. Slinky Bender

    Slinky Bender The All Powerful Moderator

    a) If it was someone you paid as an escort, you can write a review.
    b) if it was not pay for play, it should go in the NP4P section.
    c) if it was paid, the review should be of the one who got paid.
  20. betty_snj


    question...can I post a review here?

    You know, I do "hobby" once in a while and I would like to post on the review section.

    I had a hot 3some last night and I wanted to share my experience with you guys.

    Am I allowed? Or should I just make a post like I did when I had a 4some with Chuck?